Well, it’s been a good run. The people of Earth developed agriculture, composed symphonies, traveled into space, and invented a high-tech porn-distribution device that could also be used to watch cat videos, but now it’s all over. The zombie apocalypse — the one we’ve all feared for the past couple of years or so, whenever Walking Dead premiered — has finally begun.
It’s subtle. If you look out your window right now, you won’t see a herd of decomposed, blood-soaked zombies lumbering down the middle of the street. Not yet. But the evidence is there, if you’re willing to piece it all together.
Face-Eating
A naked and growling Rudy Eugene was shot dead by police whilst eating a man's face over the weekend.
Intestine-Throwing
A 43-year-old Hackensack man "stabbed himself repeatedly in front of police" on Sunday night, then "threw his skin and intestines at them."
The Resurrection of the Dead
In March, a 95-year-old Chinese woman who had been presumed dead for six days rose up out of her coffin — which, according to Chinese tradition, was open and on display in her home — and made herself some coffee.
Photo: Michael Carpenter/WENN.com/Newscom
Zombie Sightings
A zombie straight-up walked into a New York art gallery earlier this month.
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