Madonna really has adopted a Malawian kid, and today his name is David, not Luca. Donald Trump got boxed in by a UPS truck. Oprah Winfrey and Gayle King enjoyed the Streisand concert, as did other famous people. The Babs heckler is a stalker, according to Ken Sunshine. And Keith Olbermann’s bloggy stalker claims he stood her up. Tara Reid had a bad boob job, isn’t always drunk. Cindy Adams tells random baseball stories. Regis Philbin and Michael Eisner had lunch. Mike Bloomberg went to new Hearst building, has never been to new Bloomberg building. Vince Vaughn broke up with Jennifer Aniston last week, now makes out with other chicks. Ex–San Francisco first lady Kerry Kennedy is dating Times reporter Neil MacFarquhar. Kimberly Guilfoyle had a baby. Cindy Adams wore a wig to the airport. Isaiah Washington and Patrick Dempsey got in a fistfight while shooting Grey’s Anatomy, then they had a meeting. Hugh Hefner plays dominoes with his girlfriends, and that’s actually not a euphemism. Mike Bloomberg will close two lanes of Park Avenue to test-drive an Audi. A Blender writer will listen to “We Built This City” 324 times, for no apparent reason.