Atoosa to Spawn!

Rush Limbaugh is catching flak for using the phrase “anal poisoning” in conjunction with John McCain and his potential running mate, Senator Lindsey Graham. Heather Mills will represent herself in divorce court next week. Nicky Hilton couldn’t get into a Fashion Week party at the Gramercy Park Hotel’s Rose Bar, perhaps because owner Ian Schrager doesn’t like her or her sister. Woody Allen wants Scarlett Johansson to be like Meryl Streep and not go the “‘Page Six’–party route.” Also, he calls her “sexy,” which is gross. Former Seventeen editor Atoosa Rubenstein is expecting a baby in July.

Jenna Hill Miscavige, the 24-year-old niece of Scientology leader David Miscavige, says she’s been harassed by the Church ever since she came out in support of Andrew Morton’s anti-Scientology book. Plaxico Burress, Brandon Jacobs, and a bunch of other Giants celebrated their Super Bowl win by dancing on tables and spraying Champagne at Pink Elephant till 5:30 a.m. The new issue of Rolling Stone reports that Britney Spears got breast implants when she was younger, but had them removed after her natural breasts started growing. Mia Farrow thinks it’s inappropriate that Steven Spielberg has accepted an invitation from Beijing to serve as “artistic adviser” for the Olympics, given that the Chinese help fund the genocide in Darfur by supplying oil money to Sudan. Former senator Al D’Amato and his wife gave birth to their first child. Exclusive Mamaroneck golf club Winged Foot has a new president, William B. O’Keefe. Fergie dropped $30,000 during a four-hour shopping spree at Calvin Klein. Governor Spitzer made fun of MTA Chairman Dale Hemmerdinger’s shiner, though Hemmerdinger says the discolored eye was the result of conjunctivitis and not getting punched in the face. Giants receiver Amani Toomer is headed for some well-deserved R and R in West Caicos. Larry Birkhead is planning to sue the authors of an upcoming book about Anna Nicole Smith because they portray him as gay. Spamalot theatergoers on Sunday were treated to ad-libbed lines about the Super Bowl. Schools chancellor Joel Klein attended the Super Bowl and flew back immediately after on a private jet to testify at an Albany budget meeting Monday morning. Pauly Shore’s former intern, MTV producer Tony DiSanto, threw a birthday party for Shore and told guests how he used to make him run around town looking for “special lattes.” David Blaine is losing a lot of weight to prepare for his attempt to break the staying-awake record.