For reasons unclear, a slick-haired man walked by a gay man named Turtle Burkybile outside his New York home yesterday and called him a faggot. When Burkybile caught up to Slick Hair, demanding some kind of explanation and informing him that his face was going on YouTube, Slick Hair didn’t seem too concerned. “All right, put it on YouTube,” the man challenged Burkybile. “Put it on YouTube.”
The thing about the Internet, though, is that it really enjoys making life miserable for bad people. And Slick Hair, in case you couldn’t tell, is a bad person. Burkybile’s partner provides some extra details:
Our neighbors saw this altercation, and told Turtle that this man has been harassing their thirteen year-old son for years, sometimes even calling him “faggot” while the kid was in recess at school with his peers. They know who he is and where he lives. They’ve been too scared for the kid’s safety to do anything about it. But it’s going to end today.
We’re not sure the Internet is going to like this guy.
The full transcript:
Turtle: I’m sorry, you just called me a faggot on my street? Because this is going up on YouTube.
Slick Hair: All right, put it on YouTube. Put it on YouTube.
Turtle: And? You gonna call me a faggot again? Is that what’s gonna happen?
Slick Hair: Put it on YouTube.
Turtle: But you did that, right?
Slick Hair: Yes I did.
Turtle: Okay, why is that Slick Hair?
Slick Hair: Oh my god, go away.
Turtle: No, you go away, this is my street.
Slick Hair: So what? It’s not your street, you just live here.
Turtle: This is my home, this is where I live. I would never do anything like this to you on your home.
Slick Hair: Go away, it happens all the time.
Turtle: So I should just take it?
Slick Hair: It happens all the time.
Turtle: Probably to you.
Slick Hair: Go away.
Turtle: Why do I have to? You’re the one who offended me on my street. And I’m just supposed to, like, keep walking.
Slick Hair: Keep walking.
Turtle: I am walking.
Slick Hair: Hey, buddy. Get away from me.
Turtle: Or what?
Slick Hair: Get away from me.
Turtle: You’re not going to key me with that, are you?
Slick Hair: No, I’m not.
Turtle: Well you’re holding it like you’re going to key me.
Slick Hair: Oh my god.
Turtle: I just want to know where you live so I can file a complaint.
Slick Hair: File a complaint.
Turtle: Yeah, so that’s why I’m following you.
Slick Hair: File a complaint. File a complaint all right? File a complaint! File a complaint!
Turtle: That’s assault.
Slick Hair: Get away from me.
Turtle: Why?
Slick Hair: Because you’re following me.
Turtle: Because you called me a faggot on my street.
Slick Hair: Get away from me.
Turtle: Okay, I think I got enough.
Slick Hair: Get away from me.
Turtle: I won’t bother you anymore. Thank you. Thank you for everything.
