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Stupid Crime Of The Day

  1. stupid crime of the day
    Karma to Thug: Do Not Attack Friends Who Hug YouSeems pretty clear, no?
    By Chris Rovzar
  2. thwarted
    Chase Teller’s Rudeness Deters Another RobberIf this is company policy, it’s working.
    By Jessica Pressler
  3. thwarted
    Indifferent Bank Teller Refuses to Take Robber Seriously“No, this is serious!”
    By Jessica Pressler
  4. stupid crime of the day
    Gender-Bending Club Kid Bites Off Male Model’s EarJust another Sunday in New York City.
    By Chris Rovzar
  5. stupid crime of the day
    Robber Makes One Mistake in Otherwise Flawless Theft of Security CameraThe stupid crime of the day.
    By Jessica Pressler
  6. stupid crime of the day
    Woman Busted for Stealing $20, Shoving It Up ButtLet’s count the disgusting words and images from this bit of an entry in the ‘Post”s police blotter.
    By Chris Rovzar
  7. stupid crime of the day
    Chris Simms’s Marijuana Denial Is Doobious, at BestWhen the NFL player said he “took four puffs,” he was talking about CIGARETTES, obviously.
    By Chris Rovzar
  8. puppies!!!!!!
    Woman Sues NYPD After Getting Arrested and Spending Night in Jail for Taking Dog on Subway“A prostitute offered me a job!”
    By Chris Rovzar
  9. stupid crime of the day
    Judge Believes Foxy Brown Really Can Resist Mooning Her EnemiesSome judges just really have faith in the strength of willpower.
    By Chris Rovzar
  10. say it with flowers
    Flowers Were Just Robber’s Way of Saying Thank-YouThe man arrested for robbing a bank with a bouquet of flowers explains his rationale.
    By Jessica Pressler
  11. say it with flowers
    Robber at Least Nice Enough to Bring FlowersHe wasn’t all bad.
    By Jessica Pressler
  12. stupid crime of the day
    A Guy Named Maynard Is Abusing Trees in BrooklynHe has a reason, though!
    By Chris Rovzar
  13. stupid crime of the day
    Hedge-Funder’s Wife Wastes Entire Bottle of Wine by Hitting Husband With ItThese people have no boundaries.
    By Jessica Pressler
  14. stupid crime of the day
    Septuagenarian With Cane, Oxygen Tank Robs StoreAnd that’s not the best part of this story.
    By Chris Rovzar
  15. stupid crime of the day
    Connecticut Priest Fakes Cancer, Embezzles Church Money for Male EscortsGod, priests are always secretly cancer-free, aren’t they?
    By Chris Rovzar
  16. stupid crime of the day
    Cat Woman on the Loose in Manhattan!A woman in a cat mask is robbing high-end shops.
    By Chris Rovzar
  17. stupid crime of the day
    Underpants-Clad Madman Steals Truck, Injures Two Young Girls“It was a fun day until this happened,” said one.
    By Chris Rovzar
  18. stupid crime of the day
    If You Want to Off Your Husband, Don’t Just Ask Any Old Cabbie for HelpEven though it seems like the odds are probably good he’d help you.
    By Chris Rovzar
  19. stupid crime of the day
    Tween Punks Roaming in Central ParkDoes it count as “wilding” if you are in the eighth grade?
    By Chris Rovzar
  20. stupid crime of the day
    Sometimes Love Makes You Steal a BusDuane Snipes had an excuse, seriously. Several of them.
    By Chris Rovzar
  21. stupid crime of the day
    We Think We Would Have Really Liked Late Vanderbilt Heir Carter BurdenHis motto used to be: “You can never be too thin, too rich, or have too many books.”
    By Chris Rovzar
  22. stupid crime of the day
    Staten Island Yankees Pitching Coach Probably Really Regrets Flaunting That World Series RingNot only did it get stolen, but it also meant that he was just famous enough to get mentioned in the ‘Post.’
    By Chris Rovzar
  23. stupid crime of the day
    Teenage Orgy at Upstate Prison Under ScrutinyApparently, inviting underage girls and prostitutes into prison for a party is NOT a good idea.
    By Chris Rovzar
  24. stupid crime of the day
    Why Doesn’t Stuff Like This Ever Happen When We’re in the Library?A dude busted for drinking vodka in the Greenpoint branch went nuts earlier this week.
    By Chris Rovzar
  25. stupid crime of the day
    Deliveryman Arrested for Hoarding MailCue ‘Seinfeld’ jokes.
    By Chris Rovzar
  26. stupid crime of the day
    93-Year-Old Mobster Busted for Shaking Down Strip JointsAlso, the oldest woman in the world died.
    By Chris Rovzar
  27. stupid crime of the day
    Harlem Pizza Guy Fights Off Gun-Toting BurglarsAnd still delivers pies!
    By Chris Rovzar
  28. marital bliss
    Marrying a Gay Man for a Green Card Apparently Not That AwesomeTV lied to us!
    By Chris Rovzar
  29. stupid crime of the day
    Robber and Person He’s Trying to Rob Have Polite, Awkward InteractionA heartwarming New York story.
    By Jessica Pressler
  30. hero grannies
    Granny Basher Busted!A homeless man who beats up old people in pharmacies was nabbed by cops this weekend.
    By Chris Rovzar
  31. stupid crime of the day
    Fake Hasidim Busted in Complicated, Dumb Diamond-Heist PlotIt’s right out of the only good Guy Ritchie movie ever made!
    By Chris Rovzar
  32. stupid crime of the day
    Ornery Cab Driver Busts Bank Robber by Just Being HimselfThese people are heroes.
    By Chris Rovzar
  33. school daze
    Girl Arrested for Doodling on DeskThe NERVE of kids these days.
    By Chris Rovzar
  34. stupid crime of the day
    Manhattan Model Offers Cops Oral Sex in Exchange for Getting Off [Updated]Which is not exactly the usual order of operations.
    By Chris Rovzar
  35. stupid crime of the day
    Jail Chaplain Busted for Sneaking Blades Into PrisonAn imam who ministers to inmates in lower Manhattan turned out to be more than met the eye.
    By Chris Rovzar
  36. stupid crime of the day
    The Inner Monologue of a Bank Thief Getting Ready to Impersonate Paul SimonThis actually happened.
    By Dan Amira
  37. stupid crime of the day
    Crown Heights Man Wreaks Revenge on Chatty CathyThis is either a loss for the city’s reputation, or a victory for all of those who just wish that crazy person on the subway would SHUT UP.
    By Chris Rovzar
  38. stupid crime of the day
    Robber Forgets to Put On Mask Until Halfway Through RobberySome people are just not detail-oriented.
    By Jessica Pressler
  39. neighborhood news
    Weed Farm Burns Down in the BronxIn related news, every deli within a five-block radius is now sold out of Combos.
    By Chris Rovzar
  40. stupid crime of the day
    Phone-Book Kidnappers BustedThree men who kidnapped a man with the same name as their intended target are now behind bars.
    By Chris Rovzar
  41. neighborhood news
    Harlem Youths Develop Product That Freshens Breath While You HallucinateGenius.
    By Jessica Pressler
  42. stupid crime of the day
    Lexus-Stealing Cokeheads Have Crisis of Conscience“I said I got a conscience, why are you stealing these cars at Christmas?”
    By Jessica Pressler
  43. stupid crime of the day
    Memo to Car Thieves: Learn to Drive StickOr better yet, don’t.
    By Chris Rovzar
  44. stupid crime of the day
    Red Sox Robber Busted!It was time to give up, anyway.
    By Chris Rovzar
  45. stupid crime of the day
    Halloween This Year Incited Random Acts of ViolenceA few of the reported crimes from this weekend have one thing in common.
    By Chris Rovzar
  46. stupid crime of the day
    When Robbing Bergdorf, Always Have an Exit StrategyOr any strategy, really.
    By Chris Rovzar
  47. stupid crime of the day
    Taxi and Pedicab Drivers in Awesome Times Square BrawlCaught on tape: plumber’s butt, in combat!
    By Chris Rovzar
  48. second stupid crime of the day
    Major Mackerel in Samurai Sword Attack!“It’s a Jamaican thing.”
    By Chris Rovzar
  49. stupid crime of the day
    Leib Glanz Is Our New Favorite Sketchy RabbiThe fun never stops with this guy.
    By Chris Rovzar
  50. stupid crime of the day
    When Trying to Sell Your Stolen Painting, Leave Out the ‘Stolen’ PartThis is a mistake a Brooklyn couple likely won’t make again.
    By Chris Rovzar
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