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White Men With Wings Like Angels

  1. white men with money
    JPMorgan Has a Patriotic QuarterWhat’s more American than profits?
    By Noreen Malone
  2. what he’s saying is he’s sick of taking it up the ass
    ‘To Say We’re Supposed to Bend Down and Take It, That’s Wrong’JPMorgan CEO Jamie Dimon can’t stop, won’t stop.
    By Jessica Pressler
  3. white men who are accustomed to winning at life
    Davos Questioner Hits Jamie Dimon Right Where It HurtsJPMorgan CEO loses it once again.
    By Jessica Pressler
  4. bons mots
    Jamie Dimon Looks on the Bright Side“Nothing is worse than it was a year ago.”
    By Jessica Pressler
  5. JPMorgan Executive Denies He’s Leaving Because He Is Jealous of Jamie Dimon“When the outside world puts an individual like him on a pedestal and thinks that he’s the only person at the company who has any ability, sure, it can be a little frustrating.”
    By Jessica Pressler
  6. white men who clearly love sinatra
    Jamie Dimon Hosts Happy Hours in His OfficeJPMorgan may be one of the world’s largest and most prominent financial institutions, but that doesn’t mean the CEO can’t have a few drinks once in a while.
    By Jessica Pressler
  7. white men who are accustomed to winning at life
    Jamie Dimon Could Give a Hoot What Anyone Says About HimAnd that includes Elizabeth Warren, the president, and you.
    By Jessica Pressler
  8. ain’t no mountain high enough
    Jamie Dimon’s Stoner-Looking Yearbook Photo, ExplainedAt last.
    By Jessica Pressler
  9. home decor
    Jamie Dimon’s Chicago Home Contains Amazing Self-PortraitThe JP Morgan CEO’s picture tells a story.
    By Jessica Pressler
  10. white men who are accustomed to winning at life
    Jamie Dimon Just Wants to Have FunFor the CEO of JPMorgan, winning is not enough.
    By Jessica Pressler
  11. optics
    Lloyd Blankfein to Oprah?Let’s hope so.
    By Jessica Pressler
  12. why don’t you come up and see me sometime
    Protesters Express Their Anger at JPMorgan by Giving Jamie Dimon Copies of Their House KeysTramps.
  13. pilfs
    As Expected, Syracuse Students Won Over by Jamie DimonThey didn’t exactly throw panties — but close.
    By Jessica Pressler
  14. charm offensives
    Goldman Sachs Cares About Poor People’s Bank All of a SuddenLloyd Blankfein is personally working the phones on behalf of a beleaguered Chicago lender.
    By Jessica Pressler
  15. awesome things
    Syracuse Students Now Planning to Disrobe for Jamie DimonNow THIS should catch the JPMorgan CEO’s attention.
    By Jessica Pressler
  16. white men with wings like angels
    Finally, a Rap About Jamie Dimon’s Forthcoming Commencement Address at SyracuseConsidering how well “Dimon” rhymes with “shinin’,” we’re surprised no one thought of this before.
    By Jessica Pressler
  17. white men with wings like angels
    JPMorgan Is Perfect, TooLike Goldman Sachs, they had no losses in the first quarter.
    By Jessica Pressler
  18. white men with wings like angels
    Some Syracuse Students Are Psyched That Jamie Dimon Is Giving Their Commencement Address“The thing people don’t understand is that they think he’s just some leader of a corporation. But he’s more than that.”
    By Jessica Pressler
  19. oh college!
    Syracuse Students Protest Jamie Dimon by Dancing, FacebookingSigh.
    By Jessica Pressler
  20. white men who are accustomed to winning at life
    Why Is Jamie Dimon So Angry?Behind the JPMorgan CEO’s harsh words for the administration: hurt.
    By Jessica Pressler
  21. white men who are accustomed to winning at life
    Jamie Dimon Doesn’t Need Anything From Anybody EverNot government and not YOU.
    By Jessica Pressler
  22. really?
    Jamie Dimon’s Hissy FitThe J.P. Morgan CEO lashed out at the government’s “capricious, arbitrary and punitive behavior.”
    By Jessica Pressler
  23. plutocrats of tomorrow
    JPMorgan CEO Jamie Dimon’s Youngest Daughter Is a D.J.(Slash head hazer of her sorority.)
    By Jessica Pressler
  24. how do you like me now
    Jamie Dimon Ups the AnteFrom now on, shareholders will decide the JPMorgan CEO’s pay.
    By Jessica Pressler
  25. white men with wings like angels
    Jamie Dimon Will Show You His Bonus Number Right NowHe’s not waiting around for Lloyd Blankfein like some kind of wuss.
    By Jessica Pressler
  26. white men with wings like angels
    One Banker Isn’t Yucking It Up at Davos This WeekWhile Citigroup, Bank of America, and Morgan Stanley honchos party in Switzerland, one CEO is missing.
    By Jessica Pressler
  27. white men who are accustomed to winning at life
    JPMorgan Announces $3.3 Billion Profit In Fourth Quarter$11.7 billion overall. But is that good enough for their dashing CEO?
    By Jessica Pressler
  28. HBS Grad Jamie Dimon Showed His Alma Mater No MercyBusiness is business.
    By Jessica Pressler
  29. Jamie Dimon Spending $1 Million to Landscape His Own BackyardOkay, it’s not really HIS backyard.
    By Jessica Pressler
  30. before they were rock stars
    Jamie Dimon’s High-School Yearbook Photos Reveal Smoldering Band Geek, Nature LoverThe JPMorgan CEO in his adolescent glory.
    By Jessica Pressler
  31. Jamie Dimon Has a Strong Moral CoreIn addition to his famed pillowy lips.
    By Jessica Pressler