Britney Spears opened up to fans Monday evening in a lengthy Instagram post, sharing why focusing on her past accomplishments has helped her following her release from a 13-year old conservatorship.
Spears, 40, spoke about an experience she had three years ago where she had a crisis of faith because she had been hurt "from every angle" by the people around her, including her family. The pop star went on to say that she was in a state of denial to cope and avoid conflict.
"So much wasted time only to embarrass and humiliate me and I guess it seems odd to most now why I don't even do my music anymore...that's just the surface issues," Spears wrote. "People have no idea the awful things that were done to me personally ... and after what I've been through, I'm scared of people and the business!!!!"
In the new year, Spears said she wants to push herself and “do things that scare me.”
She alleged that she had conflicts with her family over performing new music and that she was denied extended time off from her Vegas residencies. Her sister, she wrote, was offered remixes of her songs, while she was denied.
In her post, Spears said while her behavior might look childish, “my family embarrassed and hurt me deeply” and reflecting on her accomplishments has helped her to move on.
“To the outside world it must seem like I’m extremely insecure and if people really knew what I went through, I think they would understand COMPLETELY where I’m coming from,” Spears wrote.
The post is the latest in a series of reflections the pop star has posted on her Instagram in recent weeks.
In one since-deleted post, Spears criticized Diane Sawyer for a 2003 interview where she asked Spears whether the young star had a shopping addiction following her breakup with Justin Timberlake.
"Something I never shared when I had that big break up years ago was that I couldn’t talk afterwards,” Spears wrote. “I never spoke to anyone for a long time.”
Spears has also criticized her forced therapy sessions while under conservatorship, and hit at her family for their treatment of her during that time.
Spears' family petitioned to place her under a conservatorship in 2008 and the arrangement was formally terminated by a judge in November. Disputes over her accounting while under conservatorship remain under the court's jurisdiction as her attorney, Mathew Rosengart, has alleged that Spears' finances were mishandled.