An Irish summer isn’t really “summer” in the sunshine sense. Although there are pockets of good weather, there’s never any guarantee of sun. Ever. It’s entirely unpredictable. The “forecast” invariably says showers, and even that isn’t a given. You just deal with whatever the weather throws at you on an hourly basis and always carry both sunglasses AND an umbrella, just in case. “Ireland would be a great country,” people love to say “if you could put a roof on it!”
Almost daily cloud cover means the concern is often more about adequate Vitamin D than SPF, and as for tanning? Yeah, that’s going to be from a bottle. Now, people in Ireland know some things better than others. A sharp wit. The best butter in the world. That kind of thing. The freckled and fair-skinned types also know fake tanner, and some of the best fake tanner brands come out of Ireland. You’ve heard of the Irish Goodbye, but have you heard of the Irish Hello? It’s most common during the summer when Irish people meet and don’t just say “Hello’” they say “Hello, is that tan real or fake?”
This is how my fellow fair-skinned Irish friend, the actress/comedian Aisling Bea greeted me when we met recently at Altro Paradiso for lunch with our (Irish-American) friend SNL Producer Erin Doyle. Aisling has skin so pale that when she has a single layer of fake tan on, you can’t even tell. She will readily tell you this. I, too, share this affliction. At the start of summer, I have to apply two layers of tan before my blindingly white legs are fit for public consumption. And by the way, this isn’t even to get a “sun-kissed” look — very pale people such as ourselves sometimes use fake tanner just to take the blue out of our translucent skin.
A few years ago, I met my Dublin friend Nicky for a drink, I think it was at Dudley’s on Orchard St. “Is that tan real or fake?” I said, before she even sat down. “It’s Tan Organic oil,” she told me. “I just put it on this morning.”
As an airline Captain for Aer Lingus (I know, cool!), Nicky wears a white shirt as part of her uniform, so putting on fake tan before a flight seemed a bit ill advised to me. “Did that not stain your shirt?” I wondered. “No!” She said, telling me this particular tan doesn’t transfer even on white clothes. My eyes almost popped out of my head. Excuse me?! Fake tan stains are such a part of contemporary Irish living that my sister Sinead buys exclusively dark bed sheets for her fake-tanning teen daughters, and even then, her OCD level clean-freakiness can’t cope.
Then Nicky told me Tan Organic doesn’t smell either. I was sold. On her next flight to NYC, she brought me a bottle of the tanning oil. (This was before it was available in the US, now you can get it on Amazon). I was excited, but had no idea how much this stuff was going to change how I used fake tanner.
My old fake tan process went like this: Apply at night — always at night — using gloves. Sleep in pajamas and sheets that you are okay staining and knowing the next day will need to be laundry day. But now with Tan Organic, I do it differently. I apply whenever I feel like it, often in the morning. I apply a small amount of oil in a thin layer all over, starting with the calves and working up. I don’t use gloves. And, I have learned over the years to do my own back using the backs of my hands (Pilates has helped with the contortions involved with that). The oil feels more like a dry oil — it’s not greasy like say, baby oil. Your skin feels moisturized, but not tacky.
After applying oil to the whole body, I take a small bit of body lotion and apply to elbows, knees and feet/ankles which brings down the intensity of the tan in those areas. Then I wash my hands and apply a drop of oil to the back of one hand and rub the backs of both hands together. That’s followed by a touch more lotion, which I rub into my hands like you would with hand cream, including the palms and wrists. Finally, I wipe off the excess from the palms with a damp washcloth. This really helps keep the tan even on the hands and wrists.
The oil absorbs remarkably fast into the skin and I even sit on my cream-colored sofa without worrying about leaving a fake tan stain. (I shudder remembering one Real Housewife of Beverly Hills rudely leaving the most offensive fake tan stain on Lisa Vanderpump’s white upholstery, and if I recall correctly, she was barely apologetic about it!) Within a couple of hours, my legs already get a really realistic tan, in fact it was the color that my skin actually goes when I have a real tan. I’d call the results a Light Bronze shade. If you want to, you can attain a deeper color by adding a second layer. I have done that and it works. (Tan Organic also offers lotion and a mousse for a darker tan, though I haven’t tried those.)
There was one element of Tan Organic oil I was a bit wary of: It goes on clear. Previous experiences with “goes on clear” tans have never worked out for me. Goes on clear, shows up patchy and streaky more like. I am delighted to report this was not an issue with Tan Organic. It’s so easy to get complete, even coverage. And true to Captain Nicky’s word, the tan hardly smells of anything.
The Strategist is designed to surface useful, expert recommendations for things to buy across the vast e-commerce landscape. Every product is independently selected by our team of editors, whom you can read about here. We update links when possible, but note that deals can expire and all prices are subject to change.
