They're not the Clintons. They're not the Sopranos. They're the Pirros. And they've got our hearts by the kneecaps. Still, we worry. In today's accelerated media cycle, could even a story this great get swept from our national consciousness? How do we keep this week's "Political Wife Bugs Her Cheating Husband" from turning into next week's "Killer Shark Terrorizes Florida Beaches"?

Give it a "gate." Affixed to a -gate, no event can be smudged from the page of history. Some options: Algate, Berniegate, Stugotsgate, Gated Community Gate, Rejected HBO Pilot Gate, Crying Through Your Most Recent Collagen Injection Gate, Leave Him! Gate, Waste Management Gate, Who Will Tell the Children Gate, My Torment Is My Shield Gate, and, of course, Troopergate.