The NFL season begins in less than a week, which is later than usual and still sooner than one realizes. We thought we’d take a look at each NFL division over the next fortnight, a scattershot glimpse that will be more updated than the magazine you grabbed before your flight but far less informative and helpful. Today: the NFC East!
NFC EAST
1. Dallas Cowboys. (Projected record: 12–4)
Most important player: Tony Romo.
Top newcomer: Dez Bryant.
Person to root against: Jerry Jones.
Fictional organizational factoid: Mark Cuban isn’t actually a real person; he’s a simulacrum invented by Jerry Jones 40 years ago to insure his own immortality.
Celebrity fan: Jamie Foxx
Games against N.Y. teams: Week 7, October 25, vs. Giants. Week 10, November 14, at Giants.
2. New York Giants. (Projected record: 10–6)
Most important player: Jason Pierre-Paul.
Top newcomer: Antrel Rolle.
Person to root against: Jim Sorgi.
Fictional organizational factoid: David Tyree’s last NFL reception, before retiring last July, wasn’t the helmet catch. (Seriously, isn’t that crazy? That was his last catch?)
Celebrity fan: Artie Lange.
Games against N.Y. teams: None, or, all, we guess.
3. Philadelphia Eagles. (Projected record: 7–9)
Most important player: Kevin Kolb.
Top newcomer: Brandon Graham.
Person to root against: Michael Vick.
Fictional organizational factoid: In order to become a Philadelphia Eagles fan, you have to drive around town with your lights off, and the first person to flash their lights at you, you have to follow them to their home and murder them. Then you’re in.
Celebrity fan: Will Smith.
Games against N.Y. teams: Week 11, November 21, vs. Giants. Week 15, December 19, at Giants.
3. Washington Redskins. (Projected record: 5–11)
Most important player: Albert Haynesworth.
Top newcomer: Donovan McNabb.
Person to root against: Albert Haynesworth.
Fictional organizational factoid: The team name is not actually offensive to Native Americans; it is in fact a tribute to St. Louis Cardinals broadcaster Jack Clark.
Celebrity fan: Tom Cruise.
Games against N.Y. teams: Week 13, December 5, at Giants. Week 17, January 2, vs. Giants.
Related:
AFC East
AFC North
AFC South
AFC West
NFC North
NFC South
NFC West