Mary Jo Buttafuoco Fires Back at Amy FisherMary Jo Buttafuoco, who is working a memoir about being shot by Amy Fisher, thinks the Long Island Lolita is trashy for cashing in on the fame she got from almost killing her. Patricia Clarkson and Gone Baby Gone actress Amy Ryan have seen each other “butt-ass naked.”
it happened this week
Blown AwayAs the first arctic blast of January weather whipped through town last week, the city was chilled by news that Iowans had frozen out New York’s candidates for the White House. Hillary Clinton’s last-minute plea on the first post-hibernation Letterman show —starring Dave’s new reindeer-wrangler beard—failed to help her, and she finished behind Barack Obama and John Edwards. Rudy Giuliani finished sixth behind Mike Huckabee but had left Iowa five days before the caucus anyway. Dark horse Michael Bloomberg denied that there was any significance in his attendance at a caucus of potential third-party candidates, though he took pokes at the front-runners’ lack of ideas. Fourth-place finisher Fred Thompson, who’s probably wishing he’d never quit as New York’s fictional D.A., lost his old Law & Order job to Sam Waterston.
intel
New Year’s Resolutions for the Best New YorkersRecently, we were watching John Waters’s 1998 movie Pecker, which starred all kinds of great people like Martha Plimpton and Lily Taylor and Edward Furlong, before he got weird and started getting arrested and dating his manager. Anyway, as in all John Waters movies, there were about five really brilliantly funny parts in it, one of which was a game the characters played called “Shopping for Others,” in which they’d go to the supermarket and sneak things into the shopping carts of fellow shoppers when they weren’t looking. (Like a long phallic gourd in the cart of a mousy single woman or a stack of Depends for a smarmy dude in tight jeans, etc.) Anyway, we got to thinking: How about if, this year, we make New Year’s resolutions for others? We’ve never made New Year’s resolutions ourselves — it’s weird, every year New Year’s Eve rolls around, and we realize we’re still kind of perfect! — but we’ve always felt we were missing out on that great American tradition. Not to mention, frankly, there are people that could use our assistance. So. To celebrate the great New Yorkers who make this blog possible and to help them continue their gloriousness into 2008, we’ve generously ginned up some resolutions for their benefit.
the sports section
A-Rod Hires Guy Oseary, in Order to Better Entertain UsThere’s a new boss in the house of A-Rod, and sadly it’s not Cynthia Rodriguez. The Yankee third-baseman, who famously just renegotiated a $275 million contract with the Steinbrenners without the help of his longtime agent Scott Boras, has hired talent manager Guy Oseary to help steer his career. “He’s focusing on baseball and needs someone whose interests are aligned,” Oseary told Variety, seeming to imply that he will be A-Rod’s only management. “This is to help him have more control of his image and brand.” Now, we watched 60 Minutes on Saturday and A-Rod definitely said that he would keep Scott Boras onboard (Boras is getting $15 million from the A-Rod’s new contract, even though it was A-Rod’s wife, Cynthia, who coached him through it). “There hasn’t been a lot of talking back and forth” between Boras and A-Rod, the Yankee explained, but it seems like they’re still working together. Which is confusing, considering that Variety says they’re not. But it’s not as confusing as the fact that A-Rod hired Oseary in the first place. Oseary, who co-founded Maverick Records in the eighties, only has entertainment clients like Madonna, Lenny Kravitz, David Blaine, and the show Last Call With Carson Daly. Which we can only guess means that television, music, or magic is somewhere in A-Rod’s near future. We’re hoping for all three.
A-Rod Bats for Oseary’s Team [Variety]
Earlier: Scott Boras Out, Cynthia Rodriguez In?
gossipmonger
Donna Karan Accepts CougarhoodFifty-five-year-old Donna Karan’s boy toy is 30-year-old model J.J. Biasucci. Ethan Hawke allegedly started dating “secret” girlfriend (his former nanny!) Ryan Shawhughes before he was divorced from Uma Thurman. Steve Martin played the banjo and read funny poems at the Cutting Room. Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin shared a happy dinner at BLT Fish. Eighty-eight-year-old Manhattan district attorney Robert Morgenthau may step down from his post, which would allow Governor Spitzer to appoint Cyrus Vance Jr. Michael Kors served mini-cheeseburgers at his store opening in Soho. Madonna kicked 25 yoga students out of a studio at the Reebok Sports Club on Columbus so she could practice by herself. Howard Stern is annoyed at Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner for bringing paparazzi to his Upper West Side block.
the sports section
Bloomberg Thinks the Big Guy Is Worth the Big PaycheckOh, Bloomberg, you’re such a kidder. Today on his weekly WABC-Radio show, his co-host John Gambling asked Hizzoner about A-Rod’s potential $275 million contract with the Yankees. “You know John, I work for one dollar a year so I really don’t have anything in common with A-Rod.” See, that’s so funny. We love it when people who are billionaires eleven times over joke about not knowing what it’s like to be rich. Bloomberg went on to hint, though, that he thinks Rodriguez is worth the paycheck. Most sports fan think, he says, that A-Rod is “probably the best athlete — physical, pound-for-pound, just raw talent — playing baseball today or playing in any professional sport, and that may very well be true.” “He’s a very nice guy when I’ve chitchatted with him,” Bloomberg added. “I remember when we tried to convince him to come to New York. The Yankees asked me to have dinner or drinks, I forget which, with he and his wife. And I said [to A-Rod], ‘The New York press is tough, but this is the Big Apple.’” Yeah, we probably were a little harsh on the ol’ guy over the years. But that’s nothing compared to what will happen when he comes back and stops living up to his price tag
Bloomberg: I’m Not In A-Rod’$ League
company town
Rove, Regan and Rather: Crazy? Or Crazy Like Foxes?MEDIA
• How did Judith Regan’s high-level lawyers let her bat-shit-crazy legal complaint get through? Oh that’s right, she’s Judith Regan. [Legal Pad/Fortune]
• CBS finally got around to filing their motion to dismiss Dan Rather’s suit. The network claims they are “mystified” by Rather’s “bizarre allegations,” and that the lawsuit amounts to a “regrettable attempt by plaintiff Dan Rather to remain in the public eye, and to settle old scores and perceived slights, based on an array of far-fetched allegations.” [NYO]
• Karl Rove signed on to become a regular contributor to Newsweek. Maybe they should consider changing their slogan to “fair and balanced”? [Mixed Media/Portfolio]
the sports section
Scott Boras Out, Cynthia Rodriguez In?As we all know, living in the world, hubris never bites people in the ass the way we want it to. Karl Rove left the White House before anything brought him down, people still read Perez Hilton, and Donald Trump still retains the power of speech. But could it possibly be that Scott Boras, the man who thought he was bigger than the World Series, is finally getting thrown from his high horse? Since it was announced last night that A-Rod went back to the negotiating table with the Yankees — alone — everyone’s been speculating on what this means for Boras. L.A. Times columnist Bill Shalkin even calls today “Schadenfreude Day” (which is funny, because we thought every day was Schadenfreude Day).
gossipmonger
Heath and Michelle Disorient Their ChildHeath Ledger and Michelle Williams are creating identical bedrooms for their daughter at their respective abodes in Soho and Brooklyn. Sumner Redstone and his daughter have reconciled after a lengthy feud over money. A Detroit preacher has come to the defense of Star Jones, who was accused of skipping out of a charity event for overweight girls. Office mates John Krasinski and Rashida Jones canoodled at an SNL after-party. Brandon Davis was “surprisingly sober-esque” at the fifth-anniversary party for Butter, only falling down once. Philanthropist Loida Lewis sold her Fifth Avenue co-op for $33 million ($12 million less than the asking price).
the sports section
Is Hank Steinbrenner Trying to Make a Name for Himself?After a columnist labeled George Steinbrenner “The Boss” years back, the cranky Yankees owner started using the term to describe himself. He’d refer to himself in the third person by the name. Now that his sons are taking over control of the team, one has to wonder if they’ll try the same tactic. It seems like Hank, at least, has started to try to make one stick for himself this week.
• On new manager Joe Girardi’s last firing. When asked if the club looked into it, he said: “I don’t want to get too much into that, but we’re not stupid.” [10/22]
• On Brian Cashman’s recommendations: ”The baseball people we have are the smartest guys in the game,” he said. ”I’m not stupid. It’s not like I’m not going to pay attention to what they say.” [10/29]
• On A-Rod’s contract: “I really believe that in his heart, [A-Rod] wants to be a Yankee, and we’re going to let him know he’s wanted. But we’re not going to be stupid.” [10/27]
• On prospects: “We want to win the World Series every year,” Hank Steinbrenner said. “We’re not stupid enough to think we can do it.” [10/25]
Oh, Hank. Nicknames have to make sense for them to stick.
the sports section
A-Rod: What World Series?Did you hear that the Red Sox won the World Series last night? No? Was it because everybody was talking about how A-Rod went free agent, as was announced during the game? After Rodriguez’s shameless agent, Scott Boras, upstaged game four by releasing the news during the early innings, it was all anyone could yammer about. Sure, the Series had been a little boring, and yeah, A-Rod has no reason to love the Sox, but couldn’t they have at least thrown the Rockies a bone? A young team with a thrilling (if disappointing) moment in the spotlight, having their last moments in the sun robbed by a man who is just hoping to make more money next year. Kinda sucks, huh? Anyway, if you didn’t hear about the Red Sox last night on TV or radio, surely you saw the news in this morning’s paper. Oh, you didn’t? You must read the Daily News or the Post, where the Series news was relegated to tiny text ribbons on the front and back pages, dwarfed by coverage of the Yankees. Well, just FYI: The Red Sox won the World Series. Not that you wanted to know. You’re a New Yorker, after all.
A-Rod Putting Himself Above the Game [ESPN]
the sports section
Joe Torre: ‘I’ve Been Pretty Damn Lucky’This was June in Chicago, at the end of a long, weird Yankees road trip that had started with A-Rod cavorting with a woman not his wife and ended with the team winning three in a row and finally showing some signs of life. Right in the middle of the turnaround had been Joe Torre — though, characteristically, we didn’t find out until much later just how much credit Torre deserved. We knew he’d called a team meeting in Toronto, but neither Torre nor any of the players would even hint at the tone or content; only when the season ended, after another disappointing first-round playoff exit, did word get out that Torre had ripped the team behind closed doors. It was rare for him to raise his voice; far more of his best work was done with pats on the back. But Torre always had a gift for what the moment required, and he never deployed it better than this season, when he kept the team battling and focused after a horrendous April and May.
gossipmonger
Cisco Adler Plops Down Near Another Hot BlondeA-Rod and ur-agent Scott Boras dined at Nello’s. Eva Mendes hopped in the wrong limo. New York’s First Lady Silda Wall Spitzer told attendees of a More-magazine convention that the best advice she ever got was “either piss or get off the pot.” Cisco Adler and Lydia Hearst were cozy at Bungalow 8. Jann Wenner was widely mocked at the 30th reunion party of the Rolling Stone staff from 1977 (everyone gave him the finger in the group photo, and no one drank the Champagne he sent). Joaquin Phoenix hung up on a reporter from Time Out after she asked him what he did to prepare for his roles. Single-again Nick Cannon hung out with a bunch of beauty-pageant queens at Tenjune.
it happened this week
Who Do You Like?As Indian summer continued its extended run last week, some of the most popular kids in town found themselves getting the cold shoulder. A federal lawsuit charged Bloomberg LP discriminates against pregnant women, and BMOC Mike Bloomberg promptly reminded us that he no longer runs his namesake company. (Later in the week, a little red in the face, he admitted he regularly talks to senior executives there.) Onetime Most Likely to Succeed Barack Obama fell 33 points behind Hillary Clinton in the latest presidential poll.
gossipmonger
Clinton’s Party Guru Also Likes LadiesBill Clinton buddy Amed Kahn threw a party at Tenjune for Mexican billionaire Carlos Slim’s son that consisted of 30 models and five guys. Greenhouse, New York’s first-ever “green” nightclub, gets an eco-preview tonight in Paris. Tory Burch and Lance Armstrong amicably broke up because they lived too far apart from one another. Sean Penn, John McEnroe, and Lance Armstrong hung out at the Soho House bar. Artist Geoffrey Raymond’s latest Wall Street–inspired work depicts Maria Bartiromo as the Virgin Mary. The New York City Partnership power breakfast caused so much commotion outside the American Express headquarters that many CEOs had to walk a few blocks just to get in. Alex Rodriguez and his wife are expecting another kid.
the sports section
Getting Washed by the Sports-News Spin Cycle
When my editors and I were finishing up last week’s story about Alex Rodriguez’s (and agent Scott Boras’s) hold on Yankees Nation, our main concern was whether we spelled “vituperate” correctly (we had) and whether anyone had taken a photo of Yankees COO Lonn Trost in the last ten years (apparently not). The piece was meant to capture a unique snapshot in the history of a team that has owned this town for a decade, a once-dictatorial enterprise facing a pivotal moment and held hostage by the best baseball player on the planet and his evil-genius agent. I didn’t expect much fuss.
But when the Post printed an excerpt from the story in its Sunday editions about discussions Boras had with a group trying to buy the Chicago Cubs, saying Boras had talked about A-Rod potentially owning a piece of the team after his career ended, I was sucked into the all-too-familiar sports-news-cycle vortex.
gossipmonger
Tony Bennett Marries Down … in AgeRenée Zellweger bought an employee at Saks Fifth Avenue in Southampton a pair of Manolos the two had been eyeing together. Top Chef gay-bashing victim Josie Smith-Malave spoke at a fund-raiser for potential mayoral candidate and current city comptroller William Thompson. Kaz Bayati, the owner of Persian eatery Persepolis, claims his quote in support of Mahmoud Ahmadinejad in AM New York was taken out of context. Anna Anisimova finds it strange that people care how much money she spends on Hamptons rentals. British Foreign Secretary David Miliband has scheduled a meeting with Angelia Jolie to discuss “global diplomacy,” and he’ll write about it on his blog. Tony Bennett officially ended his marriage to Sandra Grant Bennett and married the younger Susan Crow, though Grant is still bitter she didn’t marry Joe DiMaggio instead.
the sports section
A-Rod Accusations Just Bad End to Great Week?Professional winner Alex Rodriguez just can’t win this week. He’s been on the clock to break Barry Bonds’s home-run record for exactly three days, and the tabloids are already ‘roid raging. First, Braves third-baseman Chipper Jones said anyone who nears Bonds’s record will have to answer doping questions — which the Post turned into yesterday’s back-page headline “A ‘ROID SHOCKER.” Then, Mike Lupica’s levelheaded Daily News column today about the Players Association became the back-page banner “UNDER SUSPICION.” All this because money-hungry whistleblower Jose Canseco vaguely claims he has “other stuff” on Rodriguez in a book he’s shopping.
the sports section
Hundreds and Hundreds
To recap the weekend in local sports milestones: Tom Glavine pitched a win against the Cubs in Chicago last night, notching his 300th and becoming the first Met to do so. Also yesterday, up at Yankee Stadium, Hideki Matsui hit his 100th home run, a day after A-Rod — finally! — hit his 500th. We’ll note only that none of this happened Friday night, while we sat, shvitzing, in the Stadium and Rodriguez, a full nine days after his 499th homer, could manage only a double, a walk, and a sacrifice fly. Boo. Well, actually, yay. But also a little boo.
gossipmonger
Oprah’s Politics ClubOprah is throwing a $2,300-a-head fund-raiser for Barack Obama at her ranch in Montecito, California, and it’s sold out. Writer Robert Olen Butler’s wife, Elizabeth Dewberry, left him for Ted Turner, perhaps because Turner resembles the grandfather who once molested her. The Good Morning America intern who posed nude (for Playboy) is named Lace Rose Allenius, and she once dated Matt Dillon. Mayor Bloomberg, Donald Trump, Billy Crystal, and Joe Torre won a charity golf tourney by nine strokes. Uma Thurman is dating Elle Macpherson’s ex, Swiss banker Arky Busson. Lindsay Lohan’s bodyguard has received half-million-dollar offers to sell her out, but he won’t do it. Members of Usher’s camp maintain that fiancée Tameka Foster made up her “baby scare” so Usher would talk to her. Cindy Sheehan sang along to Cypress Hills’ “Fuck the Pigs” while drinking beer at a Randalls Island concert.
the sports section
The Yanks’ Losing Season: How Can Fans Cope?
As the halfway mark passes — um: yay, American League! — the Yankees’ season is already over: They’re ten games behind the Red Sox and out of the wild-card race. They’ve run out of saviors. Unless the earth starts spinning backward, or someone fudges the math, or Steinbrenner discovers a way to fire the entire A.L. East, there will be no signature late-summer heroics, no storming back and humiliating the Red Sox, no sweeping the postseason awards. We are witnessing, at long last, the global-warming-ish collapse of the Torre dynasty — long predicted by doomsdayers, supported recently by airtight statistical trends, and now suddenly upon us.
This leaves Yankee fans in an unfamiliar position. How do we cope with an entirely meaningless second half of the season?
the morning line
Safe
• Crime is drastically down so far this year, with the city on track to set a record in 2007: the fewest murders since the police began keeping track in the sixties. An NYU prof credits an NYPD program that sends crowds of rookie cops to bad neighborhoods — and those rookie cops would be the ones they’re now paying $25k. [NYDN]
• Is Joe Bruno the Alan Hevesi of the sky? The state’s top Republican is under investigation for allegedly steering state contracts to associates; now Spitzer is threatening to look into Bruno’s use of state aircraft — and police escorts — to fly to fund-raisers in New York City. [NYP]
• Those new New York City condoms hit 100 of New York’s 325 senior centers last week. The remaining 225 centers — save for seven apparently run by prudes — will get their rubbers this week, along with pamphlets on HIV prevention. [NYP]
• Bloomberg’s new noise code went into effect yesterday. See, isn’t the city nice and quiet now? [NYT]
• And A-Rod’s wife wore a tank top to yesterday’s game bearing the words “Fuck You” on the back. Perhaps it would have been better to convey this message at home? [NYP]
the sports section
A-Rod Is Underwhelming, Now Statistically Proven
A slow Friday at the New York sports desk was enlivened by the arrival of this season’s Baseball Prospectus. The massive tome, featuring analysis of every player on every Major League team, down to those with even the slimmest chance of actually seeing big-league playing time, has a reputation for making highly accurate predictions. So what do the gurus think about the New York teams’ chances? You’ll have to buy the book (or subscribe to the Website) for the complete story, but the general sentiment is bullishness on the Yankees (whose off-season personnel moves are praised for their long-term wisdom) and bearishness on the aging Mets (who “may have finally gotten out from under the Braves only to find that they’ve already peaked”). But perhaps most interesting are the comments on Alex Rodriguez.
the sports section
Damn Yankees
This week’s revelation that Derek Jeter and A-Rod are no longer BFF has thrown New Yorkers into a collective inner turmoil unseen since the darkest days of the transit strike. Although the relationship’s psychological subtleties have been parsed exhaustively across the nation’s sports pages, much of the city remains confused and distracted. In an effort to facilitate some kind of public catharsis — and, frankly, to explore our own emotions on the subject — we’d like to offer a one-act play, Joe Torre’s Come and Gone. It’s after the jump.
gossipmonger
Paris Hilton (Finally) Embarrasses HerselfParis Hilton’s next movie is so bad even she doesn’t want to be associated with it. Karl Rove ran a great campaign for student-body president in high school. Michael Jackson’s kids are polite, ate cake. Bob Costas told Mario Cuomo, others that the Yankees should trade A-Rod. Exes Kirsten Dunst and Jake Gyllenhaal ran into each other at Capitale, talked. Liz Smith likes Clint Eastwood’s Flags of Our Fathers. A lot. Marc Ecko bought a rhinoceros. Lawyer Lynne Stewart eats healthy. Madonna, who rents her English estate out for pheasant hunts, recently imported some new birds from France. Model Tyra Banks doesn’t like porn star Tyra Banxxx, who just made a new video. CBS is casting a reality show about lazy people. (But nobody bothered to show up! Rimshot!) Vanessa Minnillo and Nick Lachey went to a party, didn’t have their picture taken together. Ellen Burstyn wrote a book. U2 is moving its music-publishing biz out of Ireland, to avoid some taxes. Patrick McCarthy held a dinner for the new W, at which a photographer fell out of his chair. Wal-Mart CEO Lee Scott is getting a big dinner at the Rainbow Room for being good to the environment; the Eagles will perform. Aretha Franklin is afraid of heights. “Page Six” is sorry for saying Vince Vaughn was “making out” with a chick he was actually just saying hello to. A blogger says Idaho Senator Larry Craig is gay.
the sports section
Plague of the Yankees
The signs, at first, were subtle. Moments after the final out found the back of the first-baseman’s glove in Detroit, eliminating the Yankees forever from the 2006 playoffs, meteorologists reported a slight dip in atmospheric pressure over the Eastern Seaboard. Old men across the Bronx sat up suddenly in bed, complaining of strange dreams and aching joints. Dogs across the city started to bark in shrill inexplicable waves. At 9 p.m., apparently realizing that the greatest offense in the history of human sport had been vanquished, the moon turned black and plunged into the sea. The Hudson River reversed its flow, ejecting Atlantic-bound eels and sharks and whales onto the West Side Highway, where they writhed and gnashed at each other in agony over yet another failed season.