Which Garbage Animal Are You? Are you more of a pizza rat or a cigarette roach?
influencers
Oct. 18, 2019
Consider This Cigarette-Smoking Cockroach A list of potential headlines about NYC’s filthy new mascot.
Halloween Takes a Terrifying Toll on the Environment A new study finds that one-time use costumes yield thousands of tons of plastic waste every year.
7 Dogs > 1 Husband Demi Moore would rather fill her bed with dogs than men, and the math scans.
harry situations
Oct. 11, 2019
A Person on Shrooms Reviews Harry Styles’s Shroom Odyssey An imagined journey through “Lights Up,” with a person on Styles’s level.
here’s to you
Oct. 11, 2019
We Live in the Age of Egg From Greg the Egg to the Masked Singer Egg, a list of the eggs who’ve taken over in 2019.
new releases
Oct. 4, 2019
Here’s the Wife-Guy Anthem You Didn’t Want or Need Justin Bieber, Dan + Shay, and all their wives team up for “10,000 Hours,” a performance of marital bliss.
This Halloween, I’m Going As Sexy Fraud Please enjoy Yandy’s creative interpretation of the college-cheating scam.
true crime
Sept. 27, 2019
A Woman’s Boyfriend Shot Her in the Head, and She Didn’t Realize It for a Month Nicole Gordon thought she’d been in a car crash. A month later, after going to the doctor, she learned the truth.
the truth is out there
Sept. 20, 2019
A 74-Year-Old Woman Just Gave Birth to Twins And may have set a new world record in the process.
half-baked ideas
Sept. 6, 2019
No, Jeff Bezos Really Shouldn’t Buy the Amazon Unpacking a misguided viral business proposal.
No Prison Time for Ex-Cops Accused of Raping a Teen in Custody The officers admitted to having teenage sex with a suspect in the back of their police van.
lifestyle hacks
Aug. 30, 2019
Ruth Bader Ginsburg Declared Cancer-Free After Tumor Treatment The 86-year-old Justice quietly underwent treatment for a malignant growth on her pancreas.
college admissions scandal
Aug. 23, 2019
Hey, What’s Lori Loughlin Up to These Days? Oh, nothing much, just relentlessly Googling herself, why do you ask?
the epstein case
Aug. 16, 2019
Jeffrey Epstein’s Death Officially Ruled a Suicide The New York City medical examiner has concluded Epstein hanged himself.
the epstein case
Aug. 16, 2019
Two More Women Sue Jeffrey Epstein’s Estate — and His Alleged ‘Recruiter’ “Though Epstein is recently deceased, the trauma and pain he caused plaintiffs remains.”
i don’t know her
Aug. 16, 2019
Wait, Who Is Kaitlynn Carter? An abbreviated biography of the woman entangled in Miley Cyrus’s breakup drama.
the epstein case
Aug. 9, 2019
the epstein case
Aug. 9, 2019
Jeffrey Epstein Allegedly Used Coded Messages to Arrange Sex With Underage Girls “He has a teacher for you to teach you how to speak Russian. She is 2X8 years old not blonde. Lessons are free and you can have your 1st today.”
college admissions scandal
Aug. 9, 2019
Olivia Jade Embraces Her Destiny “Olivia has no plans to return to USC. She never wanted to attend USC to begin with, and now she is sure that USC isn’t the place for her.”
now smell this
Aug. 2, 2019
abortion onscreen
July 26, 2019
Would This Extremely Normal Abortion Scene Fly in 2019? Fast Times at Ridgemont High writer Cameron Crowe thinks the movie’s handling of abortion would be “outrageously controversial” now.
ye olde vagine
July 26, 2019
Anyway, Here’s Some 700-Year-Old Erotica Featuring a Talking Vagina “The Rose Thorn,” an old-timey sex poem about a woman’s debate with her own vagina, is actually 200 years older than we thought.
Hello Fellow Kids, Please Put Down Your Vapes Eight Wisconsin teens have been hospitalized over “vaping-related injuries” within one month.
It’s Already Way Too Hot And it’s only getting hotter.
I Respect and Support Margot Robbie’s Refusal to Watch Star Wars “I kind of don’t watch it now just because it infuriates people so much.”
hairy situations
July 12, 2019
Helen Mirren, Will You Please Cut My Hair? The Dame is very good with kitchen scissors.
Chicago’s Hot Duck Is an Alligator Named ‘Chance the Snapper’ “This gator is absolutely in its own league. Sorry, but nothing can compare to this.”
the truth is out there
July 12, 2019
the truth is out there
July 12, 2019
so you want to be president?
July 5, 2019
What Is Melania Trump’s Dress Trying to Tell Us? The First Lady wore a rainbow-striped design for the Fourth of July, just days after Pride month.
multi-tasking
June 28, 2019
Céline Dion Gets Herself Some Pants That Can Do Both Be very small and very large at the same time, that is.
college admissions scandal
June 28, 2019
Lori Loughlin Still Sees the College Cheating Scam as a ‘Huge Misunderstanding’ The actor is reportedly doing “the best she can,” but doesn’t necessarily see all that bribery as a crime.
investigations
June 28, 2019
immigration
June 14, 2019
5,200 Migrants in ICE Detention Exposed to Mumps and Chicken Pox Since September, 297 cases of mumps have been confirmed among people in ICE custody.
Teen Eviscerates Negligent Teachers in Scorching Valedictorian Speech “To the teacher who was regularly intoxicated during class this year…”
Naomi Wolf’s Nightmare Continues Apace Her publisher pushed back the release date after “new questions” arose about the contentious book.
I Think About This a Lot: The Cat Massage Video Ten years ago, during the summer between my freshman and sophomore years of college, a now-classic viral video colonized my brain.
Trump Thinks the Moon Is Part of Mars Today’s declaration from POTUS is brought to you by “Science!”
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