MOST RECENT ARTICLES BY:

Claire Lampen

  1. abortion rights
    Missouri Forces Abortion Doctors to Perform ‘Invasive’ Vaginal Exams“It feels like we are an instrument of the state in sanctioning sexual assault.”
  2. small blessings
    Finally, You Can LARP With Goats[books bus to Connecticut]
  3. big little teeth
    The Rumors Are True: Meryl Streep Wore Tiny Fake Teeth in ‘Big Little Lies’“She needed to be believable.”
  4. sexual assault
    Ellen DeGeneres’s Mom ‘Regrets’ Not Believing Her About Sexual Abuse“If someone in your life has the courage to speak out, please believe them.”
  5. high drama
    Trump v. Pelosi: Anatomy of a FeudA timeline of the president’s ongoing fight with the Speaker of the House
  6. abortion rights
    Alabama’s Abortion Ban Is Already Being Challenged in Court“We said we would, and we did.”
  7. horse girls
    Mary-Kate Olsen Takes Her Horse to the Olde Towne RoadShe’s gonna ride till she finishes this jumps course.
  8. #metoo
    Men Continue to Miss the Point on Workplace Sexual HarassmentMore and more managers have decided the best way to prevent sexual harassment is avoiding women altogether.
  9. sports
    The Caster Semenya Ruling Is Already Being Used Against Other Women“This is a scheme to demoralize us. I am not ready to quit athletics nor to take a suppressant treatment.”
  10. bye!!
    Victoria’s Secret Is ‘Rethinking’ Annual Fashion ShowThe brand has reportedly decided that network television is not “the right fit.”
  11. rude
    You’ll Never Unhear Paris Hilton’s Butt SongSorry!
  12. help wanted
    Lori Loughlin May Already Be Planning Her ComebackTwo crisis-management experts say they’ve been approached by the actress and her husband, Mossimo Giannulli.
  13. that’s hot
    I Can’t Wait to Hear Paris Hilton Sing About Butts“Best Friend’s Ass” may be 2019’s song of summer.
  14. rsvp
    Just Imagine If Kate and Meghan Went to the Met GalaConsider: Kate Middleton doing camp.
  15. under the sea
    Bow to Your ‘Beautiful Nightmare’ Crab QueenShe’s the platypus of the crab kingdom.
  16. the cinema
    Have You Seen ‘Heckboy’ Yet?A wholesome Hellboy alternative.
  17. hobbies
    Check Out Elizabeth Warren’s Haunted Doll CollectionUnexpectedly presidential, actually.
  18. crime
    Parents Who Imprisoned Kids in ‘House of Horrors’ Sentenced to LifeDavid and Louise Turpin pleaded guilty to a litany of depravities, including starving, beating, and tying up their 13 children.
  19. rip
    World-Famous Ghost Hunter Lorraine Warren Dies at 92Warren’s paranormal investigations inspired The Conjuring and Annabelle franchises.
  20. psa
    DIANE KEATON WOULD REALLY LIKE TO TELL YOU ABOUT HER PANTSListen to Diane!
  21. oprah’s favorite things
    The Real Reason Oprah Can Afford All Those HousesShe’s not out there dropping “$19 on smashed avocado.”
  22. ivf
    A Dutch IVF Doctor Secretly Used His Sperm to Father 49 KidsJan Karbaat swapped in his semen for donors’ and never told his patients.
  23. duh
    Are You Horny for This Andy Samberg Pic?“100% chaotic good.”
  24. where are they now?
    Good Night, Embassy Cat, and Good LuckWherever you are, we hope you’re in better, less manipulative hands.
  25. animal behavior
    Your Cat Knows You’re Calling It — It Just Doesn’t CareA new study confirms that your cat is choosing to ignore you.
  26. college admissions scandal
    Excuse Me But What Did Olivia Jade Know?“She would have never gone along with it if she thought this would happen,” a source said. Oh?
  27. ‘kay
    Spoon-Bending Illusionist Claims He Burst Pipe, Blocked Brexit“I bent the pipes, and I won’t apologize, you all deserve it!” Uri Geller gloated.
  28. the final frontier
    My New Career Is Eating Pancakes in Bed for NASASome personal news.
  29. the goodest boy
    Large, Handsome Lizard Free to Roam Park(He just has to wear a leash now.)
  30. wait what
    Woman With Double Uterus Gives Birth Twice in a MonthMy recurring stress dream, come to life.
  31. good question
    Wait, Are People Really Tracking My Emails?Constantly, as it turns out.
  32. rodent rebellion
    The Squirrels Have Declared WarNew England’s tree rats are raining wanton destruction upon the heads of maple sugar producers.
  33. christchurch massacre
    Australian Senator Blames Mosque Massacre on Muslims“While Muslims may have been the victims today, usually they are the perpetrators,” known xenophobe Fraser Anning said in a statement.
  34. college admissions scandal
    Mom Sues Scammer Parents for $500 Billion for Taking Son’s College Spot“My only child was denied access to a college … because wealthy individuals felt that it was OK to lie, cheat, steal and bribe.”
  35. questions
    Why Does My Cat Insist on Watching Me Pee?An investigation into one of life’s most puzzling mysteries.
  36. she’s worth it
    Some Subtle Celebration Suggestions for International Women’s DayFor brands looking to show love to ladies all over the world.
  37. the constant gardener
    Gardener Murders Enemies From Beyond GraveRevenge never sleeps.
  38. vest is best?
    Panicked Wall Street Bros Wonder: What Is Business-Casual???Relax, my dudes!
  39. a case of mistaken identity
    Concerned Minnesotan Calls Cops on Cardboard Cutout of Pillow Mogul“Those cardboard cutouts sure can look real from a distance.”
  40. niche drama
    Scandale! Competitive Bridge Walloped by Doping AdmissionThe reigning bridge champion has admitted to taking testosterone and a fertility drug.
  41. fraud
    Get a Load of This Fake Sex Doctor’s Unhinged GriftDr. Damian Sendler got academic journals to print studies about “butt-fisting” and bestiality.
  42. power
    Patriots Owner Robert Kraft Charged With Soliciting ProstitutionDetectives allegedly have video evidence of Kraft engaging in sex acts at a Florida spa.
  43. cats they’re just like us
    Chill, That’s Just the Way Your Cat’s Face IsStop telling it to smile more.
  44. fancy crap
    This Year’s Oscar Swag Includes a Poop-Shaped Toilet Brush“I went to the Oscars and all I got was this toilet brush shaped like an emoji poop,” I hope Viggo Mortensen is overheard scoffing at the after-party.
  45. unbearable
    Donald Trump, Jr. Enjoyed a Very Haunted Valentine’s DayDon, Jr. and Kimberly Guilfoyle dined under the murderous gaze of many blood-red bears.
  46. niche drama
    The Plot Thickens in Fiji Water Girl’s Legal DramaFiji contends the designer water mascot has “bitten the hand that feeds her.”
  47. buzz buzz
    The Bees Know Too MuchThey can do math, according to a new study.
  48. big little lies
    Everything Is Fine, Why Do You Ask?Watch Ivanka turn into the dog drinking coffee meme when asked about the Russia probe.
  49. eggcellent incentive
    Justice for BreakfastIt may not technically be the most important meal of the day, but it’s the most important meal in my heart.
  50. i do
    The Best Wedding Is This Dog WeddingWhen you know, you know.
More Articles