Sexting is difficult. I mean, I wouldn’t know, but that’s what I hear. It’s difficult to put yourself out there without a guarantee of receiving something in return. Men sometimes feel entitled to nude photographs (thanks, patriarchy) and are unsure of what to do when rebuffed. The bargaining process is tense, with a lot of back and forth, but both parties have, on occasion, been able to reach a mutually agreeable outcome.
Case in point: this Imgur collection of dudes willing to do anything for nudes. (Standard Imugr-screenshots-of-texts disclosure: There is a decent chance these are fake, though God kows why.) Here are the things men are willing to smear on their bodies in exchange for some sexts: mustard, a fried egg, human excrement. Click through the gallery below to see.
As Sun Tzu wrote in The Art of War, “All men can see these tactics whereby I conquer, but what none can see is the strategy out of which victory is evolved.”
